4 Ways To Help You Reconnect
Do you sometimes feel disconnected?
From yourself?
From the people around you?
To life?
It’s hard to to know how to re-connect when you are feeling like that. It can feel like being out of flow, out of sync, distant, detached, numb or flat. In these moments, it can feel like you are lost or directionless. This can also feel very isolating and it’s hard to know how to become unstuck.
Small steps create giant leaps. So start small and build your way up.
Here are four ways to help you re-connect with the big 4: Self, Environment, People and Spirit (SEPS)
1. Connect with Self
It may be that you just feel unaligned with who you are. Perhaps you feel disconnected from your body or your experience. There are small ways that you can start to build that connection back up with yourself.
Here are a few starters:
Identity:
A good place to start is by re-connecting with your values.
What do you value at your core?
What’s important to you?
What can be helpful is by selecting your 5 top values out of huge list (see below). Notice what you choose and why.
- Finish these sentences: I value ______ because _______.
- How I like to live by this value in my life is by _______ (enter a behaviour).
- E.G. I value kindness because I want everyone to be accepted for who they are. How I like to this by this value in my life is by giving compliments to people at least once a day or by checking in with my friends every week to see how they are going.
Connecting with your values can be important as they are usually the foundations that guide your actions when creating a life that’s meaningful to you. It can be a nice reminder of whats important to you and where you can start to re- connect to these values.
Body
Are you feeling disconnected from your body? Its time to re- introduce some self-love, slowly and gently. Small ways to do this might be:
- Self-massage; very gently you can massage you whole body, starting from your feet all the way up. Make it intentional and do it with love. Treat your body like you would a loved one.
- Stretch. With each stretch. Pick a colour that represents healing to you. Close your eyes, with each stretch (starting from your head then to your neck, shoulders, arms, so forth) take a deep breath and when you do, imagine you are sending the coloured healing light through your breathe to each area. Really visualise the healing colour engulfing that focused part of your body. Notice where you feel the stretch and how good it feels. Work your way down your body.
- Look in the mirror and say one thing you love about your body, notice that area. Close your eyes, place your hand on that area and send it love through your hand.
2. Connect with Environment
Sometimes it can feel like you are out of touch with the world around you.
Here are some ways you can reconnect:
- 5-4-3-2-1: Sit outside in a comfortable place. Take 3 deep breaths. Now slowly do the following:
- 5 things you can see – take note of what you can see. List a few details, their colour, texture or placement.
- 4 things you can hear- what can you hear? List 4 things you can hear. Really tune in and listen to the world around toy.
- 3 things you can touch- what can you touch? What can you feel? The chair supporting you? The ground beneath your feet? Your clothes?
- 2 things you can smell- what can you smell? Notice that. If you really can’t smell anything, have some oils with you and smell that. Or smell your skin or clothes.
- 1 thing you can taste- what can you taste in your mouth? List one thing. Perhaps you can carry a mint with you and notice the sensation in your mouth.
Repeat until you feel more grounded. This small exercise can help you reconnect with the world around you.
Alternative:
- Go to your nearest park or grassy area. Go outside. Take your shoes off. Plant your feet on the grass. Squish your toes, walk around. Notice how the ground feels under your feet, how it supports you. Imagine your energy flowing downwards back into the ground, taking with it anything that doesn’t serve you anymore. Put your palms on the ground; feel the ground, press against it. Notice the sky, the clouds. Notice how good it feels to supported by the earth.
3. Connect with People
When you are feeling disconnected, that last thing you probably feel like doing is reaching out to the people around you. You might feel they won’t understand. The trick is to reach out and try anyway, even if you don’t feel like it. Connect to the people who make you feel safe; the people who you are usually comfortable with.
What can happen is that when you feel disconnected and you withdraw, you limit yourself from being exposed to even a small opportunity to have a good experience of re-connecting. So try reach out to the people around you:
- Make a plan with someone to have something to look forward to
- Call a friend who makes you laugh and that you feel safe with
- Go for a walk with a friend; you don’t even need to speak, you can just walk side by side
- Reach out to your GP if you don’t have a support network around you
4. Connect with Spirit
What makes you feel alive?
What ignites that fire in your belly?
Maybe there isn’t one thing; maybe its just spending time with loved ones, listening to music or swimming in the ocean.
Answer this: When was the last time you felt most alive?
- What were you doing?
- Who were you doing it with?
And the last question: How can you do it again?
Sometimes life tips into too much work and not enough play. Responsibilities and duties always luring over us. Its time to start prioritizing play. Do something that’s fun, that makes you laugh or that ignites a sense of silliness. Connect with your human spirit.
Some ideas can be:
- Swimming in the ocean
- Paint
- Get away for the weekend
- Games night with family or friends
- Write
- Draw
- Dance
- Sing
Whatever it is, let it be for pure pleasure and pleasure only.
Most importantly, remember that when you feel stuck or disconnected, it can feel overwhelming to think about the big picture. Try break it down and ask yourself, what can I do right now, in this moment, that will help me feel connected? Whatever it is, do that.
Resources:
Beyond Blue
Contact Numbers:
LIFELINE - 24 hours/7 days
13 11 14
BEYOND BLUE SUPPORT SERVICE - 24 hours/7 days
1300 224 636
SANE - 10am-10pm/weekdays
1800 187 263
Author: Cody Tonkin